KICK ASS HORROR SHORTS by David Dawes

One part of horror that really doesn’t get enough attention is the short film. Here is the short on some kick ass horror shorts that I have come across on various DVD’s.

Zorgon: The H-Bomb Beast from Hell
d. Kevin Fernan 1972 9 min Color
Criterion Collection DVD Fullframe
A goofy little silent short shot in one weekend as a college assignment earning Kevin Fernan an A, is one of the Xtras on disc number 2 of Criterion Collection DVD of the 1970 “Evil Dead” inspiring “Equinox”. Filmed in Los Angeles’s Bronson Canyon with several key talents of the “Equinox” like Mark McGee, f/x men Jim Danworth, Rick Baker, and David Allen. After a couple of mysterious death’s, a merry bunch---shall we say unmasked---the mystery behind Zorgon; a man in a furry suit, long white hair, octipi-tentacle legs, with a horn faced mask with one eye budging. Parts of the costume where used in John Landis’ “Schlock”. Interesting and it’s a great fun title to say.

It Took Guts
d. Eric Forsberg 1979 4:50 min Color
The Asylum DVD Fullframe
Director Eric Forsberg’s debut, a creative 4 min 50 seconds Super 8 MM high school short---that was a punk cult hit in the early 80’s---is reason number 9 why you should not use a Q tip. Our man whilst cleaning his ear with said tip, discovers a need to cannibalize and violate himself; chewing on his hand, gouging an eye out and ripping out his guts for lunch are all part of his self inflicted deeds. It’s a nifty little xtra on “Night of the Dead” The Asylum DVD.

Night of the Living Bread
d. Kevin S. O'Brien 1990 8 min B&W
Anchor Bay Entertainment Fullframe
I offer this as a Tagline: “After years of being eaten…now it’s their turn”. Yeah, odd as it sounds, sandwich makin’ wonder bread dead are on the offensive forcing several to board themselves up with sandwich bags in old house in this short spoof of the G.A R. classic. Some what clever I guess, it makes a nice extra. Notable Saying: “Apparently slices of bread have animated and are attacking human beings…yes we realize how incredible this story sounds…but reports have been pouring in from all areas of the city and surrounding communities…we repeat, slices of bread are rising and attacking humans”. Found on Anchor Bay ”Night of the Living Dead” Millennium Edition.

My Sweet Satan
d. Jim Van Bebber 1993 19 min Color
Synapse DVD w/ Deadbeat at Dawn, Commentary, A few surprises Fullframe
A disturbing little Pseudo documentary Van Bebber 16 mm short about a heavy metal Satanist Ricky who calls himself the Acid King and likes to get wasted with friends. All is well until he gets ripped off, then there is hell to pay. Gritty mean & excessive violence ensues. Definitely shows the directors knack for low budget filmmaking. Notable Saying: “Satan Approves”. You’ll find it on Synapse Deadbeat at Dawn DVD and on Visions of Hell: The Films of Jim VanBebber Box set.

Chunk Blower
d. Jim Van Bebber
Here it is, the promotional trailer for a movie that was never made. Also found on the Visions of Hell: The Films of Jim Van Bebber Box set.

Roadkill: The Last Days of John Martin
d. Jim Van Bebber 1994 15 min Color
Also Found on the Visions of Hell: The Films of Jim Van Bebber Box set. This gory and disturbing 16mm short film by Jim Van Bebber details the filthy and bloody last days of a meat eating beer guzzling cannibal killer that lives life in that Chain Saw kind of way. But just sitting around the house isn’t cutting it so he kidnaps, tortures and kills two unfortunates. Me like! I couldn’t find a trailer so here’s the first half of Roadkill. Worth mentioning VanBebber went on to complete a 10 years in the making genre defying must see film “The Manson Family”.

Caruncula
d. Mariano Baino 199? 20 min Color
No Shame DVD w/ Dark Waters Fullframe
An Xtra on the 2 disc “Dark Waters” DVD, Mariano Baino’s second short introduces us to his surreal side as baby dolls are cut burned, sewn together, tied with barbed wire and hung on hooks by a wide eyed maniac that goes on to kill a couple of unfortunates at a movie theatre. But there’s a gory little humorist twist. Definitely showing style with lighting in the Bava Argento vein this helps set the tone for the strangeness of his masterpiece “Dark Waters”. Pretty slick Mr. Baino.

Butcher Bob
d. Stian Stenersen 1999 30 min Color
Red Stream DVD Fullframe
Being a fan of Norway’s death metal band Gorelord I was pleasantly surprised when I found this 30 minute short in the Xtras on the Gorelord /Wurdalak split DVD. [Rent it on Netflix]
Horror loving hikers headed for Black Mountain come across a bunch of decapitated sheep’s heads and an old barn. Now I would have turn toe with haste a trucked my ass right out of there. But not this bunch, and they fall to bloody ruin at the hands of Butcher Bob because of it. Fools. Ha! Make that dead fools. A short but right to the point slasher maniac gore piece with a gritty tone and a score reminiscent of “The Untold Story”. Norwegian with English subs. Here’s the music video mixed with clips from the film. You may hate the music but it will give you an idea of the film.

Brain Eater
d. Conor McMahon 2001 Color
A 9 and a ½ minute short about a coach and his kids that play what ever sport it is where they hit a ball around with hockey like sticks encounter zombies or Braineaters on a desolate stretch of road and stir up a couple of funny deaths. Conor McMahon defiantly has promise. From on the Fangoria “Dead Meat” DVD.

Return of the Dastardly Zombie Vampire Mummy from Planet X
d. Brain Singleton 2006 18 min B&W
Elite DVD
You gotta love the name of this dirt cheap funny sci-fi spoof short film by Brain Singleton that is an Xtra on Elite’s “Forest of the Dead” DVD. A space ship crashes bringing a Dastardly Zombie Vampire Mummy---more like a man wrapped in toilet paper---to terrorize the comedy dialogued cast of “Forest of the Dead”. Shot in black & white for extra gusto.

Criticized
d. Richard Gale 2006 18 min Color
This is an absolutely excellent short film found in the Xtras on Uwe Boll’s “Seed” DVD. A moviemaker doesn’t take to kindly to a critic bashing of his film. So he abducts him and, well, let’s just say things get ugly. Excellent, acting, directing, it’s good all around. Writer Director Richard Gale followed it with the mock trailer “The Horribly Slow Murderer with the Extremely Inefficient Weapon”.

Terror
d. Ben Rivers 2007 23 min Color
Found on the abysmal “Experiments in Terror 3” DVD of Avant-grade short films. This one stands well above the rest offered here as a very inventive short film made entirely of clips from various horror movies. Halloween, Friday the 13th, Evil Dead, The Beyond, City of the Living Dead and many more all seamlessly spliced together in a pastiche of suspense and terror that culminate into a climax of violence and gore. Defiantly worth the watch and if nothing else you can play name that movie with your friends. Either way this one is a winner that comes highly recommended.

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SMALL GAUGE TRAUMA DVD
Yes, The rest of these are found on the Small Gauge Trauma DVD, a collection of 13 shorts from the fantasia film festival. Here’s the ones that caught my eye and the trailer.

Amor Só de Mãe
d. Dennison Ramalho 2002 21 min Color.
“Love From Mother Only” is easily one the very best short films I have ever seen---my favorite of the bunch---is an awesome blasphemous down right wicked little diddy from Brazil, that’s festering with black magic, sex, murder, visceral gore and creepy possession shot with a stylish perseverance that brings the Argento-ish feel of Marino “Dark Waters” Baino to mind. Filho is torn between taking care of his mother and his lust for a possessed ‘Whore O Satan’ Formosa. Fiendishly FANTASTIC. In Portuguese with Subs. On a side note director Dennison Ramalho who debuted with the 11 minute award winning short “Nocturnu”, teamed with Coffin Joe as co writer on his latest film “Embodiment of Evil”. The third and final film in his long dormant “At Midnight I’ll Take Your Soul” Trilogy. And that sounds damn good to me.

I’ll See You In My Dreams
d. Miguel Ángel Vivas 2003 20.28 min Color.
Zombies, very Italian looking zombies make things rough for double barrel toting honest citizen Lucio---who can’t stand god damn zombies---and his girlfriend in this very atmospheric romp from Portugal. With great photography including some “Evil Dead” cam, rotting zombies, gore and a splatter of black comedy this is excellent and favorite next to “Amor Só de Mãe”. As an added bonus there is “I’ll See You In Your Dreams” music video by Portuguese metalers Moonspell. I must say I’m rather fond of their “Wolfheart” LP.

The Separation
d. Robert Morgan 2003 9 min Color.
Excellent, very powerful must see stop-motion puppet piece---reminds me of that Tool video from years ago---concerning Siamese twins that are separated against their will, and make one hell of an attempt to get shall we say…Re-connect. Wildly creative, grotesque, sad and beautifully constructed it might even make you shed a tear.

Tea Break
d. Sam Walker 2004 6.55 min Color.
Welcome to an artsy and decaying downbeat very gory conveyor belt of unfortunates are decapitated by a butt scratching, chain smoking worker waiting for his tea break. Nice.

Chambre Jaune
d. Helene Cattet, Bruno Forzani 7.55 min Color.
I believe this is a French short “Yellow Room”. It looks like a color blasted homage to Italian gialli---and Dario Argento---to me. A woman is at the mercy of a black gloved straight razor wielding killer under positively vibrant Bava/Argento lighting with a blitz of freeze frame editing and style proofs to be very interesting. So positively Italian!!